When Opportunity Knocks: A Dog’s Diary

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So you know what they say.  When opportunity knocks, open the door.  When I hear knocking, I bark, but that’s almost the same thing. Right?  Anyway when the opportunity came for me to write this post, I jumped at it.  I’ll gnaw on whatever bone I dig up.   

Life and Opportunity

Leashes Stifle Opportunity

I look most regal when I’m on the leash, at least that’s what people who we meet on our walks tell me.  But really, it’s…what do humans call it again?  A façade.  Yes, it’s a total façade.  It’s all about keeping up appearances because of the ignominy of the leash.  If you want to know the real me, come for a walk in the forest when my human lets me run free.   Then you’ll see my joyful abandonment as I chase every opportunity, ahhh the scents, and the path of every proverbial squirrel.

Golden Retriever running free through the snow, exploring every opportunity

You should make sure you have off-leash opportunities everyday.

And in case you’re wondering, retractable leashes are still a leash. They give the illusion of freedom, but it’s just a lame attempt at compromise. I’m going down a rabbit hole here, but there are no winners with compromise. You know that right?  Compromise is, in the words of Chris Voss, wearing one black shoe and one brown.  No-one is happy. Unless you’re a dog or a cat, your shoes should match.

P.S. Dogs are particularly good at deferring which is why we’re so beloved, and get to sleep on the bed, and get that extra treat. You should try deferring.

Freedom Invokes Good Behaviour

 I’m actually really well behaved off-leash.  If I notice a human or dog coming, I return to my human and wait for the newcomers to pass.  

Leashes restrict thoughtful behaviour

However, I just realized that when I’m on-leash, I let my human do all the work.  I don’t worry about boundaries because she’s got the leash and dictates what I can and can’t do.  All filters are forgotten.  She has to get firm with me or I try to sniff every dog’s butt and seek attention from every human that comes my way.  I turn off everything I know and rely on her to establish the boundaries.  Is it like that with humans and their kids?  Or bosses and their employees? I’ll have to research that.

Communication is Essential

My Human is Learning Dogspeak

Frankly she’s not very good at it. I mostly communicate with body language –  raise my eyebrows, smile, blink, wag my tail, nuzzle her hand, raise my paw. I have quite the non-verbal vocabulary. Sometimes when I’m just wanting attention, she thinks I need to go outside so I humour her by stepping outside, and when I turn around to come back in, she’s already closed the door – she has a short attention span. Then I woof – once is usually enough to remind her.

The Growl

It wouldn’t be a discussion on communication if I didn’t talk about my growl. For some reason when I hear car doors slam, it elicits a very deep growl. Or reflections in windows, that’ll make me growl too. Everyone can relate to growling at the unknown though right? Human or animal? Those faceless threats that awaken our deepest fears? Just make sure the growl doesn’t become part of your everyday.

The Tail That Wags The Dog

This happens most when my humans have left me home alone. When they come back I make them so happy when I howl and whine, wag my tail, and smile my crazy smile.  Do I feel any shame over my behaviour? Not really. It garners me a lot of pats and hugs and sweet talk and sometimes, sweet treats, so I have no intention of telling them that I’m kinda working the scene. After-all that’s deference. Plus, friendliness is the tail that wags the dog.

What I’m learning About Opportunity

So my life is becoming more interesting since writing about opportunity – I’m going on more adventures and living more deliberately. Don’t get me wrong, I still sleep an inordinate amount of time – that’s what my human says anyway,  but really I’m letting my sub-conscious go to work. I actually act things out in my sleep. The other night I dreamed I was being chased by a cat – good stuff – maybe I’ll write a book.

Pet Peeves

So I thought this title was clever. I’ll keep it in future posts that I write, because depending on how this one does, I may get to write a post once a month. On to my pet peeve though: being told I have to stand up while being brushed – I hate that. Do you know how good it feels to be brushed? Like humans stand up for massages – pshaw!

Advice From The Kennel

  • When opportunity knocks, open that door. You never know what adventure waits for you.
  • Take off your leash. It may be invisible to others, but you know when you have it on.
  • Show people you’re happy to see them.
  • Defer to others
  • Embrace life!

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Simply . . .

P.S. I forgot to tell you that my name is Teddy. As you can see from the pictures, I’m a Golden Retriever and the trails are my happy place. Live life large.

P.S.S. I sort of told. Sorry about that.

Thank you for sharing this post! I appreciate it 😊