What do you hope for?
2020 has been a hard year.
For all of us.
And for some, it’s been a lot harder than for others. It appears as though life as we knew it is unraveling at an alarming pace, and the loose threads are billowing about without form.
But…with the unraveling comes the opportunity to create something new. Something better.
What if every action you take improves upon what was? What if instead of worrying about the unraveling, you initiate change?
“I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples.”
Mother Teresa
Let Go
Before change can occur, we have to understand the ugly and dangerous narratives of our past that are still exerting force on our present.
We live in community. Our beliefs and actions impact those around us. We can’t claim our individual rights without understanding how those rights impact others. Without considering the responsibility that comes with those rights. Without realizing that what we protect might be causing harm to others.
For those of us for whom the status quo is a place of comfort, it’s time to break out. It’s time to acknowledge to ourselves and others that our experience is not the shared experience of everyone in our community, our country, our world.
We can choose to resist change or we can choose to support change.
There’s nothing in between because every action, every choice, every argument we make takes us in one direction or the other.
Seek first to understand.
Making Choices
Change starts by looking at the world through a lens different than your own. Seeing neighbor, community, country, world from another person’s perspective, without judgement, without defense, without promulgating the dominant narrative.
Every ACTION is a choice.
And every CHOICE is an action.
Even the choice to sit and do nothing is an action.
Think of what our world could look like if we not only want for others what we want for ourselves, but actively work towards making it happen?
People Aren’t a Zero Sum Game
Life isn’t a cherry pie where you have to fight for the last piece.
By standing up for the rights of others, you don’t lose your rights.
Listening to the experience of others does not negate your experience.
Valuing someone with differing religious beliefs does not erase your religious beliefs.
Ask yourself, if that was me, my family, my loved ones, what would I want to be different. Then do something that’s within your realm of control. We can all do something.
“We rise by lifting others.”
Robert Ingersoll
There comes a time when we get rid of the old to make room for the new. This is true in our personal life. We weed out possessions or habits that don’t contribute to the kind of life we want for ourselves, replacing them instead with ones that move us toward our goals. Why would this not also be true for our collective lives?
First we have to want to learn, and to learn we listen, and if we understand, we must act.
September 30th was Orange Shirt Day in Canada. A painful reminder of the travesty the Residential Schools had on the Indigenous communities, where children were ripped from their homes because ‘people in power’ decreed it should be so.
When confronted with the past, you have a choice.
You can say ‘it’s history’. It’s past. It’s no longer relevant. Thus, giving a nod to the status quo.
Or
You can ‘hear’ the stories and acknowledge that they are more than distant echoes from the past. And seek to understand the ways that the harm is still felt by many today.
Start the ripples of change.
Examples to shore up the status quo.
We all know or know of BIPOC individuals who are more successful than us by far. Some of whom may even deny that racism exists. While I’m happy for their success, their story is not representative of everyone’s story.
Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean I speak for all women. My experience is not representative of all women.
Seek First To Understand
Look at the world through a window, not a mirror.
A mirror reflects only us. Our experience, our beliefs, our biases.
While a window allows us to look beyond ourselves to see what life is like for others.
None of this is easy. It’s filled with uncertainty. There are growing pains.
But, this I know.
If you want what’s best for the world,
Seek first to understand.
Prayer of St. Francis Lord, make me an instrument of your peace: where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy. O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love. For it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
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Simply . . .
P.S. I’ve struggled to keep up with my blog this year. Part of the reason is because I have several other writing projects on the go, and I’m not good at juggling.
And much of what is happening in the world brings me despair, as I’m sure it does you. It’s what I want to write about. And so I do. And then I don’t post my thoughts. Until today.
We should know better, shouldn’t we? Have we learned nothing from the past? Why is it so difficult to let go of power structures or policies that are not supportive of all? Why does a pandemic divide people rather than draw us closer? When did politicians quit being public servants? I have so many more questions than answers. But it starts with me. And you. And the next person. Together we can bring about change.
Anyway, before this becomes another blog post, what I’m trying to say is that I’m going to take my own advice and do what I can to support change. Read, listen, do.
I will continue to use this space to curate and share ideas, tools, and inspiration that help me be a better person in this crazy wonderful world. The schedule remains to be seen as I’m about half way through writing the second book in my series and am still editing the first. I’m trying to learn how to be a better juggler 🙂
Breathe deeply. Step deliberately. Live fully.
~ Priscilla